Melissesages

Ten! Ten days til new television. (Ah ha ha! I feel like the Count on Sesame St)

Last night Tyler and I were watching Stick It on TV for like the eight zillionth time.

For a few months, we had free movie channels as part of our Direct TV package, and Tyler came in one day while I was watching this movie, a very clever, funny teenager flick by the producers of Bring it On. He ridiculed the movie and me watching it, and then sat down. And stayed. I think in the three months we had free movie channels, we probably watched all or part of Stick It at least 4 times. It’s just that fun.

So, last night, it’s premiered on Oxygen or some other “women’s network,” and Tyler says, “Man, why don’t we own this movie?” and immediately follows that with “it’s so bad, it’s awesome.”

Now, this irked Melissa (Hey, Tyler, you know how I said I wouldn’t use my blog just to whine about you when you make me angry? LIE!), not because we shouldn’t just buy this movie - because we should - but because Tyler had to pretend that it was what I call a “craptacular” movie.

Craptacular movies are those that some people are a little -or a lot- ashamed that they enjoy (not me, though. I’m ashamed of nothing). I’m talking about movies that you know are just flat-out bad, but still manage to be fun in some way, a feat in itself. For example, every time “Deep Blue Sea” is on TNT, I end up watching at least half of it. Ditto for “Roadhouse,” “Dracula 2000,” and “Van Helsing.” (I can’t help it, every time Dracula’s brides start moaning and wailing in circles around him, I almost pee myself.) If you really wanted to define “craptacular” movies, it would be flicks that you enjoy for a reason other than what the filmmaker actually intended. For example, I love Deep Blue Sea not because it’s a thrilling adventure with an interesting moral undercurrent (no pun intended), but because it’s hilarious when Samuel L. Jackson gets eaten by an enormous mutant shark. And when some random character recites a weird speech, like when Saffron Burrows dramatically confesses “we used gene therapies to increase their brain mass. As a side effect, the sharks got smahhter.”

See, I have no shame about loving these movies, because I am not delusional: I know that they’re bad. I just don’t care, because liking a movie and thinking a movie is good or bad are two different things. Objectively (if that’s even possible), I know that these craptacular movies are truly terrible. But because they’re campy, or unintentionally funny, or just so dated you can’t help but laugh, they ARE entertaining. And sometimes you just don’t want Good. Sometimes you want Fun.

Anyway, back to my original point: Tyler is ashamed of Stick It, and so he pretended it was a craptacular movie, when really it’s not. Actually, it’s hilarious, and the gymnastics are incredible, and we spout lines from the movie all the time. And, well, I got a little defensive of “Stick It,” because it was falsely accused, by Tyler. Shame on him! It’s not a bad movie, it’s just got a (unfair) reputation as a “girly” one.

In conclusion, people, if you like bad movies, or girly movies, or violent movies that are set in prison for some reason you’re too afriad to really explore, I say own it. Like what you like, and fear not what others think of your movie choices. Because I guarantee you, the best film critics in the world are secretly harboring copies of “Snakes on a Plane.” As well they should.